April Is National Quiz Month! By Peter Filichia
As we established last week, April is National Quiz Month. As a result, we’re spending each Tuesday of the month seeing if you can recognize lines and lyrics from various Broadway and off-Broadway musicals.
Before we get to this week’s quiz, here are the answers from last week’s quiz, which asked you to identify lines and lyrics from musicals that each employed an “honorific” – which, as the dictionary informs us, is “a title or word implying or expressing high status, politeness, or respect.”
Fred Abramowitz, Brigadude, Bryan Brooks, Scott Bullitt, Joshua Ellis, Jason Flum, Ingrid Gammerman, Charles Kirsch, Arthur Robinson, Donald Tesione, Rick Thompson and Matthew Turkle were among the highest scorers. They knew anywhere from some to most of these answers:
- “You’re an old Dutch master; you’re Mrs. Astor” (“You’re the Top” – Anything Goes)
- “No wonder Mr. Goldwyn made a bid.” (“Imagine” – Babes in Arms)
- “A flower for Miss Elliott; tribute to her splendor.” (“Glamour Dream” – Lady in the Dark)4. “Mr. Harris, plutocrat, wants to give my cheek a pat.” (“Always True to You in My Fashion” – Kiss Me, Kate)
5. “But Mrs. McCloskey ain’t a good scout.” (“The Oldest Established” – Guys and Dolls)
6. “Howdjado, Mrs. Mezzanine?” (“Opening” – New Faces of ‘52)
7. “Mister, you can be a hero.” (“Heart” – Damn Yankees)
8. “Bye, Mr. Moon – bid me goodbye!” (“I’m Flying” – Peter Pan)
9. “I can see her now: Mrs. Freddy Eynsford-Hill.” (“I’ve Grown Accustomed to Her Face” – My Fair Lady)
10. “You’re no friend to Marryin’ Sam if your name is ‘Sir’ or ‘Madam.’” (“A Typical Day” – Li’l Abner)
11. “Miss America can just resign.” (“I Feel Pretty” – West Side Story)
12. “Have some fried rice, Mr. Soy Sauce.” (“Mr. Goldstone” – Gypsy)13. “Mrs. Phi Beta Kappa Peterson.” (“An English Teacher” – Bye Bye Birdie)
14. “Climb ev’ry mountain to find your Mr. Snow.” (“Chin up, Ladies” – Milk and Honey)15. “I’ve a hobby: I play gin with Mr. Bratt.” (“The Company Way” – How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying)
16. “You’d think at least ‘Miss M’ they could try.” (“Miss Marmelstein” – I Can Get It for You Wholesale)
17. “Dear Miss Shlumpfert, you’ve been such a comfort.” (“Deep Down Inside” – Little Me)
18. “Mr. Gaily, take a bow!” (“She Hadda Go Back” – Here’s Love)
19. “What do you call assisting Mr. Stanley?” (“A Quiet Thing” – Flora, the Red Menace)
20. “Mademoiselle, where in hell can you be?” (“Come Back to Me” – On a Clear Day You Can See Forever)
21. “And finally, in the category ‘It’s Your Choice,’ the winner is Mrs. Phyllis Duncan.” (“Academy Awards for Parents” – The Mad Show)
22. “To make with the words about the missus-to-be when what you think is an empty heart is full.” (“I Love to Cry at Weddings” – Sweet Charity)
23. “Madam, Adam will be overjoyed.” (“Forbidden Fruit” – The Apple Tree)
24. “I also hope to explore the personality of Mr. MacGregor in his conflicting roles as farmer and humanitarian.” (“Book Report” – You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown)
25. “It’s ‘Walk, Don’t Run.’ I just kill time till Mr. Kirkeby’s done.” (“Upstairs” – Promises, Promises)
26. “Just me, Mr. Preacher and you.” (“Let’s Have a Simple Wedding” – Dames at Sea)
27. “Here he is – Mr. Whiz.” (“Live, Laugh, Love” – Follies)
28. “Like ‘Hiya, Miss,’ ‘Hiya, Sir,’ ‘May I take your order, please?’” (“Coffee in a Cardboard Cup” – 70, Girls, 70)
29. “I could stay home every night, wait around for Mr. Right.” (“There Are Worse Things I Could Do” – Grease)
30. “Madame! I have been designated by Gaston.” (“The Contract” – Gigi)
31. “You’re one hell of a mademoiselle: you taught us all to dance.” (“Hey, Yvette” – Over Here!)
- “And, honest, mister – I’m a millionaire.” (“All I Care about Is Love” – Chicago)33. “Mr. Karp said ‘Very good!’” (“Nothing” – A Chorus Line)
34. “I love you, Miss Hannigan!” (“It’s the Hard-Knock Life” – Annie)
35. “Hello, old friend! Hello, Mr. Money!” (“Five Zeros” – On the Twentieth Century)
36. “‘Is your knife dull, sir?’ or ‘Madam wants what with her meat?’” (“It’s an Art” –Working)
37. “Mrs. Mooney has a pie shop.” (“The Worst Pies in London” – Sweeney Todd)
38. “Mr. Craig, before you say something more, let me tell you something straight out.” (“When You’re Right, You’re Right” – Woman of the Year)
39. “‘Yes, Miss Bzzz?’” (“Franklin Shepard, Inc.” – Merrily We Roll Along)
40. “No, look over there, Miss. That’s done with green.” (“Color and Light” – Sunday in the Park with George)
41. “Grandmother first; then Miss Plump. What a delectable couple.” (“Hello, Little Girl” – Into the Woods)
42. “There’s lots of smirking motel clerks who call me ‘Mrs. Smith.’” (“You Can Always Count on Me” – City of Angels)
43. “And a wardrobe to choke Mrs. Astor’s pet horse.” (“How Lucky Can You Get?” – And the World Goes ‘Round)
44. “Mr. and Mrs. George Widener may proceed to Promenade Suite B-51.” (“The 1st Class Roster” – Titanic)
45. “Then I went and married Mr. Harry Thaw, eccentric millionaire.” (“Crime of the Century” – Ragtime)
- “I’m off to your place for a date with Mr. Clean.” (“An Invitation to Sleep in My Arms” – A New Brain)47. “How I met a swell named Mr. Black.” (“Look at Me Now” – The Wild Party)
48. “Pay no attention to Mr. Smarty – he’s full of beans and banana oil.” (“One Wonderful Day” – Saturday Night)
49. “Fast speaking secret agent – Mr. Moto!” (“The Genius on Cleveland Street” – A Christmas Story)
50. “Mr. Whooffles, we’re Boston-bound!” (“Runnin’ Wild” – Bullets over Broadway)
Now onto the new one, which deals with Royalty. To make it easier on you, I’ve arranged them in chronological order from the show’s first major opening date. So if you recognize a quotation from 1981 and one from 1983 two quotations down, you’ll have a good idea that the one in the middle is probably (but not necessarily) from 1982.
Here are fifty from both Broadway and off-Broadway musicals. From what songs and shows do they spring? You may send me your answers at [email protected]. And even if you don’t, you’ll see on next Tuesday the answers when you take our third April quiz.
- “I don’t like crap games with barons and earls.”
- “I’ve interviewed Pablo Picasso and a countess named di Frasso.”
- “‘Yes, Your Majesty!’ ‘No, Your Majesty!’”
- “If I ever saw a prince, my Harry was him.”5. “I will tell you all the books I’ve read and the way I met the king of France.”
6. “The mayor of Shannon would shoot off a cannon and crown ye the queen.”
7. “Princes come, princes go.”
- “That’s enough for me to be living like a king.”
- “And this queen has her aces in all the right places.”
- “‘Thanks a lot, king,’ says I, in a manner well-bred.”11. “The duke of Windsor and his duchess … at last you’re out of my clutches.”
- “But alas! The prince couldn’t find a lass.”
- “The grown folk who wander to and fro have ways known to their own folk we throne folk don’t know.”
- “In fact, the more we British get to know of you, the more we wonder why our king let go of you.”15. “Somewhere beneath the mountains of Mexico there dwelt a royal fella, King Hamlet.”
16. “There are heroes in the world; princes and heroes in the world.”17. “May God bless and keep the czar far away from us.”
18. “If I could have been a duke, for you I would have.”
19. “I’m the band from Macy’s big parade, a wild Count Basie blast.”
20. “I’m not Queen Victoria. That suit has to go.”
21. “He comes! His Royal Tallness! His Highest Highness! His Way, Way Upness!”
- “Just avoiding Maharajahs and obsequious old codgers.”
- “But did your king ever say a thing or decorate me?”24. “Princes. Why not kings?”
- “I’ve been through Gandhi, Windsor and Wally’s affair.”
- “Not kings and lords but nations, not thrones and crowns
– but men.”
“C’mon, king of the Jews.”28. “Or I shall marry the Prince of Wales.”29. “All your strangers better beware. This is the king of the jungle here.”
30. “Merlin the magician prophesied a virgin to a proper dauphin.”
31. “He ain’t no sheik. That’s no great physique.”
32. “Every prince has got to have his swan.”
33. “If the tea the shogun drank will serve to keep the shogun tranquil.”
- “Now I don’t even wince when it eats the prince.”
- “My set of Theodore Dreiser; my portrait of the kaiser.”36. “Is that a chair fit for a king?”
37. “Your queen is dead. Your king isthrough.”
- “We were cowgirls and pirates and gypsies and queens, but I never knew you.”
- “I know a duchess who got pregnant at the bar.”40. “He’s a prince who prepares.”
41. “Knock ev’ry duke and count and baron right off his feet!”
42. “You would be queen to me – not wife.”
43. “‘Cuz there happens to a prince right in front of your nose – and he happens to be the man I chose.”
44. “Warn the duke!”
- “And in the end, the queen would send the men off to hell.”46. “He wants to dine with a duchess and a duke.”
- “A prince is a pauper, babe, without a chick to call his own.”
- “Fairy tale romance, princess and hero.”
- “The hands that hold the scepters, every head that holds a crown.”
- “I’m a young Norwegian princess or a milkmaid.”
You may e-mail Peter at [email protected]. Check out his weekly column each Tuesday at www.masterworksbroadway.com and each Friday at www.kritzerland.com. His new book, Strippers, Showgirls, and Sharks – a Very Opinionated History of the Broadway Musicals That Did Not Win the Tony Award is now available at www.amazon.com.
